


He's trying his best

by unprofessional_queer



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Abandonment, Blade of Marmora Keith (Voltron), Blood and Injury, Dark Shiro (Voltron), Dehumanization, Eventual comfort?, Everyone Hates Keith, F/M, Fear, Galra Keith (Voltron), Gender-Neutral Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Hurt Keith (Voltron), Hurt No Comfort, Inprisonment, Mental Health Issues, Post-Episode: s02e08 The Blade of Marmora, Sad Keith (Voltron), Self-Worth Issues, Verbal Abuse, except pidge, i hate shiro in this, im sorry in advance, keith gets galran features, keith looks like a galra, keith the outcast, plot twist (or not idk if u expected this), the paladins reject keith
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-23
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:08:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 6,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27168416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unprofessional_queer/pseuds/unprofessional_queer
Summary: Our best boy is trying his best to make everyone happy. (and his spiraling thoughts definitely not helping) Keith goes on a BoM mission to stop a Galra supply ship and accidentally misses the Coalition Air Show. Throw injuries into the mix and you have a recipe for disaster.
Comments: 63
Kudos: 125





	1. Getting on Board

**Author's Note:**

> *WARNING* CHAPTERS 9 & 10 CONTAIN YELLING, VOMIT, AND BLAMING if any of these are triggers, you can tell me in the comments and i can give a vague summary excluding those details <3  
> If you have any suggestions about this story or any others I may write in this fandom let me know! Comments are very appreciated and if you have any questions or another fandom or fic idea not in this genre let me know <3 (im sorry for the inconstant posing schedule, I recently got a job everyday after school and oh boy, haha but i am trying to write a ton at a time) With that, would you rather chapters /possibly/ being small sometimes with a more regular, everyday post schedule. or, do you want a once a week update thats like 3-5 chapters worth?

Here he is, on a solo mission to plant a bomb on a Galra cruiser. A very dangerous mission that wouldn’t have even been on the table if not for the fact that this particular ship held enough quintessence to more than double the fire power of Zarkon’s army.

Keith had to constantly remind Kolivan that if anyone could pull it off, it would be him. Not because he had a huge ego, but because he was that smallest and most agile Blade. Keith continuously reassured Kolivan that he wasn’t nervous, knowing that if he told his leader he had even the tiniest doubt about the mission, it would get called off.

But he was nervous. He was nervous that something would go wrong, nervous about how the paladins would react when he returned to the castle of lions, terrified even. The one thing that kept him grounded was the knowledge that it wasn’t a completely solo mission. Kolivan forbade any Blade from going on missions totally alone. (Something Kolivan enforced after Keith joined the Blade because he’d grown quite fond of the youngest Blade, though Keith didn’t know so no one dare say anything about the new rule.) So, Keith wasn’t alone, he had a pilot waiting in a ship on a nearby asteroid.

  
Keith had slipped into the ship when they opened the trash shoot, something the Galra did only once a day. Keith was under strict orders to stay hidden in the vents and be extremely cautious when planting the bombs. If Keith was seen by even one sentry guard before the thermals were planted, the mission could be compromised. And so, in true reckless Kogane fashion, Keith was doing almost the exact opposite.

He had good intensions, he really did, but luck was never on his side. After scoping out the whole ship in secret, Keith saw his chance. He memorized the schedule the guards were on and got ready. As soon as the sentry guarding the reactor room left his field of vision, Keith appeared from the shadows. He briskly headed to the control panel in the center of the room and got to work downloading and memorizing the upcoming fleets’ flight patterns and mapping all the planets the Galra had control over. Keith knew Kolivan would be angry, but he had to. The Blades needed this crucial information if there was any hope of defeating Zarkon. A little part of him hoped that the paladins wouldn’t be so angry if they knew all he had done during this mission.


	2. A Quick Escape

As Keith glanced up from the control panel his blood ran cold, he looked out into the hallway and was greeted with his worst fear. He left the vent hatch open. He tried not to panic, knowing it would only add to the bad situation.

Keith slinked back into the reactor room and checked the download time. When he saw the percent on the purple Galran screen, he knew he would be cutting it close. And that was saying something because Keith Kogane thought he was barley going to have enough time to get the flash drive completely downloaded and shimmy his short ass back into the vent unnoticed. He concluded that if extracted the flash drive immediately after it hit 100%, he had approximately thirty seconds to get himself back into the vents. The odds were great.

Keith watched as the percent bar slowly filled, almost completely full. He got into position, hand hovering over the flash drive. He mentally prepared himself for the quick getaway, thinking about all that he risks if he doesn’t make a perfect extraction. The instant the bar read: 100% DOWNLOADED, he snatched the flash drive and ran as fast as he physically could, breathe caught in his throat.

Running as silently as his Blade armor would permit, he strained his ears for the running footsteps of any guards that had spotted him. As soon as he turned the corner to get to his precious vent access point, he heard voices behind him. It wasn’t what he was hoping for to say the least.

To trigger a sentry guard’s auditory alarm, you’d have to be yelling at it. That was definitely not the case with actual Galran guards.

Cursing himself, Keith somehow managed to run faster in an attempt to not be discovered. In his blind haste to simultaneously get in the vent and close the hatch, his leg slid out from under him and the hard, unforgiving metal of the ship sliced into his right side. The only sound that left him was a strained grunt of pain as he reached down to grab and secure the hatch.

He quickly and silently made his way down through vent maze. He was almost above his desired destination when he felt his side grow wet.

He mentally pushed it aside as he thought he was just sweating from the mad dash down the hall. That is, until the adrenaline wore off and he was left feeling trapped in the tiny vent shafts as he desperately clutched at his side.

Keith, generally speaking had a high pain tolerance, but this was bad. Scratch that. This was probably the worst pain Keith had ever felt in his entire life. He didn’t dare stop where he was, determined to make it above the large storage room filled with shelves and crates of quintessence. He grit his teeth and inched along at a much slower pace than he would’ve liked. It felt like ages before he finally made it to the vent hatch that he knew dropped straight into the storage room.

Keith was both grateful and upset that he had finally made it there. After finally making his destination he finally got a proper chance to catch his breath, but he was dreading finally taking off his torso armor.

After mentally steeling himself, Keith closed his eyes and with clenched teeth, stripped off all his black Blade armor from the waist up.

The pain from crawling through the vents was nothing compared to what he felt as the rough material of the under suit peeled away from his injured side. When he finally removed all of the under suit from his ribs, he took lots of shallow, gasping breaths. The pain that flared up left tons of dark spots in his vision that threatened to take his conciseness.


	3. Dealing with the Injury

When he finally got his breathing under control, he took his first look at the wound. The jagged metal on the ship left more of a large tear than a cut and was steadily oozing blood.

Keith stared in awe at the large rip in his side as he wrapped his brain around the gruesome process of patching himself up. He stared in shock for quite some time until the bleeding slowed some, then searched through his small bag of necessities. At the bottom of the bag under some green nutrient goo and water, Keith found the basic med kit that all the Blades carried with them on missions.

Inside there were large gauze pads, antibacterial spray, a role of strong adhesive tape, and a small tube of numbing cream. The med kits all had these basic supplies because they were the most commonly needed. If Blades were going on a mission to a more high-risk place (Keith in this instance), they were encouraged to pack more extensive emergency supplies.

With Keith’s luck, this was the one time he forgot to recheck his bag for the needed materials to stitch up his side and stop the bleeding.

He mentally kicked himself for being careless as he grabbed the antibacterial spray. He knew the spray would hurt on his deep cut, but he didn’t expect it to be so horrific.

He clicked the button on the small bottle of alcohol based sterilizing solution, gritting his teeth as he counted the ten seconds it took for the bottle to empty and finish spraying.

Tears slipped past his eyes as the canister finished spraying his side. He bit his lip in an attempt to keep silent, accidentally drawing blood. The youngest Blade sat very still, waiting for the pain to ebb enough to put the numbing cream and bandages on. While he sat, he thought through the rest of the mission and his extraction.

He after looking at the time, he figured he had almost three vargas to sit and tend to his side before he had to plant the bombs and make his escape.

He knew once he planted the thermals, he would have to make a hasty dash to the fleet’s hangar where the ships were held. Once he made it, he just had to get the heck out before the entire ship turned into scrap metal.

Even after Keith’s diligent planning period, he had forgotten to take one thing into account. He was almost directly over the center of the room, and there was a twelve-foot drop under him.

He hadn’t given it a second thought back in the Blade headquarters because he had dropped from much higher heights, but this time he was injured. He knew he was going to have to make the drop whether he wanted to or not. It was simply unavoidable, no way around it.


	4. Go Time

Keith made sure to pack his side with as many gauze pads as he could because the force of the impact would cause the bleeding to start again. After he layered a thick layer of gauze, he secured it with a copious amount of medical tap in hopes that the make shift band aid would stay put.

He put all of his Blade armor back on, something that was already difficult without the close proximity of the vents and a large wound on his side, and positioned himself by the vent hatch in preparation of the main part of his mission.

He counted off the seconds, silently opening the hatch. As soon as the last guard left the room, Keith sprang into action. He jumped from his hiding place and hit the floor with a thud. The landing jostled his side, and it hurt, but he had more urgent matters than a large rip in his side.

He told himself that his stupid injury wasn’t important as he quickly started planting the bombs and setting the timers. The only thing he was focused on was not screwing this up.

The paladins already hated him after all, and he’d be damned if he let a little cut stop him from completing the mission. This thought had him finishing up his task quickly. He did a quick once over of the room before he took off in a dead sprint, knowing what would happen to him if he didn’t hurry.

Keith’s heart was pounding heavily as he checked around corners and dodged sentries. He was making fairly good time considering his circumstances.

Learning from his past experience, he made sure not to rush through the halls at full speed. His helmet lit up with a warning as the thermals hit the one-minute mark just as he reached the aircraft hangar.

After a quick glance around the large room, he ran to the closest ship. He knew he should have paid more attention to what was in the room with him, but he was rushed for time and he got careless.

When he turned his back to the room to load into the aircraft, he heard the unmistakable sound of a blaster firing.

Keith felt the powerful impact against his back-armor plate, but didn’t stop. He already had the aircraft powered up and in position by the time the top half of the ship locked into place.

In his peripheral visions, he saw the large red numbers tick down on his helmet as he slammed on the gas. The numbers flashed, unforgiving as he pushed the ship to its absolute limit trying to get away faster.

Not long after he fully exited the Galra transport ship, the countdown hit zero and the ship exploded. Now all Keith had to do was get to his pilot waiting on the meteor.


	5. Crippling Disappointment

The adrenaline rush wore off a lot sooner than Keith would have liked.

He knew at the time that the blast had hit him, but he had hoped it wasn’t bad. He couldn’t see all the damage, but he could definitely feel the intense burn on his shoulders where the shot hit him and was both shocked and relieved that he couldn’t smell his own burnt flesh.

As the intense panic from making his getaway finally left, Keith set the ship to auto pilot, steering it in the direction of the rendezvous point. For the first time in a full day, Keith thought about what he had to do when he returned to the paladins.

They had a big, important coalition air show scheduled later that day and Keith knew he couldn’t miss it. He checked his data pad for the time, fully expecting to see that he had another varga or so before he had to be back and ready to perform.

When he saw the time stamp flash across his screen, his breath caught in his throat and tears slipped from his eyes. He had forgotten to take into account that the time fluctuated between galaxies.

As he realized that he was in fact an hour late for the show, everything came crashing back down on him full force.

He quickly threw off his helmet as a sob bubbled up in his throat. He was going to miss the arms show and it was completely his fault. This knowledge paired with the horrible pain in his side and back, made him loose it.

He curled up on himself as he was hit with waves of grief. He couldn’t remember a time in his life where he cried like that, big heart-wrenching wails escaping him in the small aircraft.

This was the first time since the news of his father’s death that he let himself cry like he was now. That had been the darkest time in his life, and now he could feel his father’s disappointment burning in his skull.

He thought about the little, scrawny roughed up kid from the Garrison that Shiro saved. Keith knew back then that the pilot should have picked someone else to help, now that thought came back full force. Keith had caused the man so much trouble, and the man was never angry with him.

He knew that was changing now.

Keith should have seen it coming, should not have gotten too comfortable. Now it’s too late. The teen cursed himself. He learned young from the “homes” that you should never get comfortable, never get too close. They leave you when you need them most.

Keith was sure that is what was gonna happen. He messed up one too many times, and this was the thing that would push Shiro away. 

Keith felt like he did when he was ten, sad and afraid. All he wanted was for Shiro to wrap him up in one of his amazing hugs. He wanted Shiro to flash him with one of his reassuring smiles, to be told that everything was okay. That wasn’t going to happen this time, the boy told himself over and over.

Not only did he miss the airshow, he got hurt on the mission. The flash drive couldn’t make up for his negligence. With this thought, Keith curled in tighter on himself and fell asleep.

The proximity alarm flashed on the control panel inside the stolen aircraft, waking the boy from his less than peaceful sleep.

Keith quickly got to his feet and wiped the tears that had dried off of his face. As for his injuries, he just planned on saying that the vents left him sore and stiff. He planned on telling his driver that the blast didn’t make it through his armor.

He mentally steadied himself as the other pod neared, readying himself for any possible way this unwanted interaction could play out. 

Stepping into the other pod was almost painful, somehow entering it made everything that just happened seem more real. Keith was not prepared for the energetic Blade that he was assigned to.

Regris was very jumpy and all over the place, seemingly ecstatic to finally have another Blade with him. The small Blade was assaulted with questions about how the mission went, Regris barley stopping in-between them to give Keith enough time to give an answer.

The bubbly Blade hardly notice the burn marks on The Blade’s armor, far more interested with asking Keith another unnecessary question. Keith eventually got the other Blade quiet enough to Facetime Kolivan for the mission debriefing.

The little Blade was feeling a little better about himself until he told his leader about the flash drive. Kolivan was surprised that the new recruit was able to get the information successfully, and was quite impressed. Of course, he had to give Keith the little lecture about putting yourself in danger, and of course Keith completely missed the playful tone in his voice and the little half-smirk he carried.

When the screen finally faded to black, Keith handed his flash drive to Regris and requested to go to the Castle of Lions.


	6. The Journey Home

Keith sighed as he finally got a moment to himself. After the mission briefing with Kolivan and the concerned Galra, Keith was somehow even more tired. He slowly shuffled towards the back of the aircraft where the cots were laid out and got settled. Depending on the size of the ship, each BoM shuttle had three to five cots set up in a little room so the Blades could rest. The youngest paladin took off his helmet and boots, huffing as he finally got to lay down in a comfortable position. As Keith drifted off, he thought about his arrival at the Castle. He knew the paladins would be pissed and would probably punish him. He couldn’t imagine what they would do once they asked what was so important about the mission and he wouldn’t even be able to show them the stupid flash drive. Allura seemed to hate him no matter what he did, and if Allura didn’t like something, Lance didn’t either. Coran was going to lose his mind. There was no way they could perform his amazing show that he worked so hard on without five lions.

As he came to the conclusion that he was going to be hated on his arrival, Keith fell into a fitful sleep. Well to call it sleep was generous. He was doing more adjusting trying to get in a comfortable position than actually sleeping. The gods must have taken pity on him at some point he had actually fallen asleep. The only way the young Galra knew he had fallen asleep was because he woke up to the aircraft landing inside one of the Castle hangers. When he finally got his bearings, he wished he had stayed asleep. Everything was sore. His back burned and his side ached something fierce, and he had a miserable headache. Keith wondered that if he laid sill enough, that maybe Regris would feel bad for waking him and just take them back to the BoM base. Sadly, he realized that was not the case when Regris knocked on the door to inform him that they had landed.


	7. Return to the Castle

With a grunt, Keith sat up. He realized very quickly that he was worse off than he had originally thought he was when the room started spinning. The Blade took a moment to close his eyes, attempting to rid himself of the intolerable dizziness. He quickly realized that his efforts were futile when he reopened them, only to find the room around him still tilting and swaying. Mustering as much concentration as he could, Keith got his boots back on his feet and laced up. How he managed such an amazing feat was, he isn’t sure. The galra grabbed his bag and stuffed it into his helmet before he grit his teeth and stood.

As expected, the room around him dipped and swayed, but Keith was ready for it. The young Blade grabbed the wall with his free hand as he waited for the dizziness to pass. This time unlike before, a considerable amount of the vertigo left him. /maybe because he stood and his blood was flowing correctly?/ Whatever the reason, he definitely wasn’t complaining. The paladin took a steadying breath before he slowly started for the pod’s cockpit, hiding the pain in his side and shoulders and slight dizziness. He took one last weeping sweeping glance around the room before he was content that he’d gotten everything. After thanking Regris for the ride and answering any last questions about the mission, Keith turned toward the exit and finally stepped out. Keith was unsure if he could handle what was about to happen, but he promised himself one thing. He would take it, no arguments.


	8. After a Mission?

The young Blade was greeted by an empty hangar. Not that it wasn’t expected, but it still hurt to step into the dark, frigid docking bay. The paladins must have been extremely angry with him this time. While he was used to coming back to the castle ship with no welcome party, they had never shut all the lights off.

Keith knew that Kolivan wouldn’t be happy if he knew that was happening. At the BoM headquarters, anyone that was returning from a mission was greeted with their pack (a Galran family unit) and a doctor, absolutely no exceptions. The Blades also had to rest for a duration of at least two human weeks in between missions to ensure that there were no underlying injuries and to make sure that the Blade was comfortable and felt safe.

That was not the case at the Castle. After missions with the other paladins, everyone typically watched old Altean movies together. Well, everyone except Keith. He tried to join them once, and Lance wouldn’t allow it. The new red paladin said that Keith would ruin the movie and the cuddle pile with his grumpy attitude, saying “No. Absolutely not. He will start a fight I know it. He always does. I swear he is trying to kill me. Have you seen the way he looks at me? I’m gorgeous and if he sits near me, his Galra will rub off and ruin all my charm.” In an attempt to convince everyone that Keith shouldn’t be allowed.

It was clear that day that everyone agreed to some extent. Keith had his suspicions before, but he was certain then. No one on the team wanted him. He had no one, not even Shiro stopped Lance that day.

Since then, the norm for the team after a mission was: everyone cuddles up in the lounge with snacks and games, watching Altean movies and learning Altean board games. Everyone except Keith, who was left to either sit alone in his room or work off his ass in the training room. 


	9. The Consequences

When the paladin/Blade walked in to the navigation room, all conversations stopped and the mood of the room quickly took a nose dive. All the other paladins were already changed back into their everyday clothes and it was painfully obvious who the outsider in the room was, thanks to the traditional black and purple body armor Keith was wearing. The others in the room were all looking at Keith with varying degrees of disgust, annoyance, and plain hatred.

Shiro broke the tense air of silence first, “Keith! Where were you?! We needed you today and you weren’t there! How did you think the planet’s occupants acted when they realized there were only four lions? I’ll tell you; THEY WERE OUTRAGED! And so were we. How irresponsible can you be?”

Keith opened his mouth to try and explain the circumstances, only to quickly be shut down by Allura. “NO, STOP! This is where you stop talking. No excuses this time. You have a duty to the PEOPLE Keith. I CANNOT BELIEVE that you would let your little “play-date” with the QUIZNACKING BLADE OF MARMOURA go this far! How dare you! Aren’t you the one that was telling Pidge they couldn’t leave Voltron because people needed all of us?” The princess sucked in a very forced breath, continuing, “You no longer have to worry about your little side gig with us. Since you seem to love running around with the Galra, go ahead. Shiro got Black to trust him again, so you are no longer needed to form Voltron. We no longer need you, Keith. Turn in your bayard. You can grab a pod. I’m sure your Galran parents would love a reunion. Go back to the other Galra scum, maybe you can learn to be useful there.”


	10. Keith's Departure

Keith let the hurt and sadness wash over him, accidentally letting the emotions flash across his face. Quickly closing his eyes and looking at the ceiling, he took a pained breath and schooled his face. The only thing he couldn’t conceal was the tears glistening in his eyes, threatening to fall. He wouldn’t let them though. Keith has only ever cried in front of Shiro once, and he didn’t want to add anyone to that list. Setting his jaw, the ex-paladin summoned his bayard to his hand and forced himself to walk towards Allura. With every step, Keith was made aware. Aware of the pain in his side and between his shoulder blades. Aware of how tired he was. Aware that he was being forced to leave his only /family/. Even if they hated him, they were his. They were all he had, and now he was aware that he had no one. Not a single person on Earth was going to miss him. And now, no one in space wanted him either. No one would care what happened to him.

With this revelation, Keith broke. As he handed the weapon to Allura, he let the tears fall and a sob leave his lips. He ran out of the room, covering his mouth and grabbing at his badly wounded side. Everything was a blur to him as he ran out to the pod ships, Regris long gone. He got in the closest pod he could reach and started it up. The Blade tore out of the hangar, his vision swimming. The teenager set the pod to fly away from the Castle, not looking or caring what direction he was going.

Immediately after he set the ship to auto-pilot, he leaned over his chair and violently threw up. The smell was sickening and caused the little Galra to vomit again. This time it was just stomach acid, because he wasn’t given a chance to eat again on the ship that Regris was driving.

Being sick twice left Keith shaky and cold. Even in the small ship, the Blade suit he was wearing did little to keep the cold bite of empty space off of his skin. Keith was shivering too hard to pilot the ship, so he just let the auto-pilot do its thing and curled in on himself.

That’s how he was left for far too long. Curled up in the little seat, a protective hand on his side. On a ship in the middle of God knows where, no food, no water. The ship riding on empty. The condition the paladins left him in was awful; freezing, hungry, and emotionally wrecked. 


	11. Shiro is confused and Pidge is Concerned

Shiro heard the doors hiss shut, barely able to form a coherent thought. Everything happened so quickly. One moment Keith stepped into the main hub, then the next Allura had revoked his paladin rights. That made no sense. Well everything madeno sense, but Allura essentially firing Keith REALLY made no sense. What was the mission even about? Shiro knew it was important, but couldn’t remember what was so special about it. An even better question, was Keith hurt? No one stopped to ask or checked him over. When he ran out, he was favoring his right side. That was concerning. He practically took off with his hand glued to his ribs. Takashi could not for the love of God understand anything that just played out in front of him.

So naturally, the first words to come out of his mouth were, “What the fuck just happened?” His mind was running a million different ways, and he couldn’t sort through all the chatter. “First off, Allura. You can’t make decisions like that without consulting me. You may be the pilot of the castle, but I am the leader of Voltron. I understand that he made you angry, but that could have been handled much better.” The princess opened her mouth to object, but Shiro cut her off with, “I really do understand, I’m angry too. Think about it for a second. Would Keith ever intentionally blow us off? Let us get hurt?” The leader took a breath then addressed the entire room, “I know you all remember Naxela. Keith would never let us down intentionally. I know for a fact that he thinks very highly of all of us, and that he would do absolutely anything for anyone in this room. What I am saying is, Keith had a very good reason for missing the Air Show. I think something went wrong during his mission.”

As Shiro was trying to put his words together, Pidge took it upon themselves to try and fill in the gaps. “He looked hurt, well obviously- He looked physically injured. We could all see the tears on his face. /not the point Pidge, lets get on with it/ I’m not sure who was paying attention, if you were you would have seen. When he came in, he was all hunched over and he was walking really slow. I’m not exactly sure why he was walking like that, though knowing Keith, there is a good chance that he either got an injury somewhere on his back or he reopened a cut on his back. I do know for certain that he hurt his side. When he left, he was cradling his ribs. Generally speaking, most injuries to the ribs are pretty bad. He could have cracked or bruised ribs, there is also the possibility that he punctured something. I do know one thing though, making him leave the Castle without getting checked out was a very bad move. Depending on the severity, Keith could have anything from a broken rib to a punctured lung. He definitely has an infection. I am willing to bet money that he didn’t let some strange Blade clean up his side, and I know he hasn’t changed out of his sweaty Blade uniform. You can clearly see a gash on the side of his suit, along with some possible burn marks on the shoulders? I’m not entirely sure what the large mark on his shoulder armor is.”


	12. The Team's BS (Pidge's pov)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *TW* Yelling, Self Worth, Insecurities. If you ask, I can summarize what happens in this chapter in a less intense, more vague way. (the next chapter also keeps these themes)

The paladins felt a sinking feeling in their stomachs, everyone realizing that they could have just indirectly killed their friend. No one dared to break that very tense silence, all of them knowing that they fucked up. Well, all except Pidge who was still absolutely fuming, “Do you guys really not see what has been happening? Keith has been putting up with so much lately so we would be happy! He has been working his ass off trying to unite the Blades with other alien races, and y’all have not even acknowledged his efforts. He trains religiously every day, trying to prove to Allura that he can still be useful even if he is a Galra-“ Pidge took a large breath and pierced the Altean princess with a killer glare, near hysteric, “You fUCKING ASSHOLE! After everything he has done for you. AFTER EVERYTHING HE DID FOR YOU?! He has tried so _hard_ to get you to trust him. Scratch that. He tried so hard to get you to stop hating him so much. News Flash, HE WASN’T THERE. HE WAS NOT THERE WHEN ALTEA WAS DESTROYED. HE DID NOT DO THAT.” At that point, Pidge was taking heaving breaths with tears freely flowing down their cheeks.

Shiro tried to cut them off saying, “Pidge why don’t you just calm down? Listen, what happened was-“

“NO YOU LISTEN SHIRO. You are just as fucking guilty; he trusted you! He told me what you did. He went to you after he learned he was Galra. After Allura turned him away, after she called him a freak. A monster. He went to YOU. He was scared and alone, so he went to the only person that he could trust. Keith wanted reassurance, a hand to hold; shit, someone to tell him he wasn’t a mistake. To tell him it wasn’t his fault, that he didn’t hurt those people.” The green paladin cast him a life ending look, overwhelmed with rage.


	13. The Castle Has Cameras

“That’s not what happened, was it? What did you tell him Shiro?” Nothing. “What did you say to him?” They asked again, venom seeping into the already furious voice. “FINE! I’LL TELL THEM! I’LL FUCKING SHOW THEM. When he confided his deepest insecurities in you, you took his worries and shot him with them. Correct me if I’m wrong, but it went a something like this right?” Pidge turns around and walks over to their chair and pulls up their hologram computer screen.

“Pidge- What are you going on about? Did Shiro do something to Keith?” Lance asked the green paladin, now getting concerned and confused. He couldn’t imagine Shiro doing something to hurt anyone on the team.

“Yeah Lance, he did.” They finish pulling up what they were looking for, the surveillance footage from that night. The paladin was baffled after Keith came to them as a blind, hysteric, sobbing mess. 


	14. Shiro's Sins

They get the footage mirrored onto the castle’s large monitor. The horrifying scene begins with Keith using the DNA scanner on Shiro’s door and letting himself in.

“Hey Shiro? I hope you don’t mind me stopping by real quick, but I just- Allura’s been really mad at me? I don’t get it. I didn’t know I was Galra. I’m not- She can’t really blame be, ca-“The half Galra got cut off mid-sentence by Shiro. The leader gets off of his bed and stands across the room from him, as if he couldn’t bare to be any closer to him.

Said paladin starts in a very stern, bordering angry tone with, “No, you don’t get to talk to me like we’re friends. You are not Keith, and you are definitely not my brother. You are a Galra. A monster.”

The once-paladin takes a step back, looking as though he had been slapped across the face. “Sh- Shiro? What are you- what do you mean?!” You can see his eyes brim with tears on the screen.

Everyone in the room holds their breath in silent anticipation, waiting for their leader’s response.

Shiro apparently sees the other’s tears and that only fueled his anger. The older man cuts off the other’s self-pity with, “Oh go cry me a fucking river. Allura has every right to be mad at you, to hate you. I have every right to hate you. You can’t expect you little secret to get out and just be normal with people, or are you really that stupid?” 

“What- why are-“ the younger teen gets cut off once again, this time with an enraged Shiro screaming at him.

“Why? Only because YOU TOOK MY ARM! You knew what was happening! I know you did! You say you didn’t know, that you weren’t one of the ones that hurt me, but we both know that you were.” Shiro said, taking a few steps forward. “All Galras are the same. Evil. Vile. Scum.” Shiro punctuates the three words by poking Keith in the middle of the chest. “That I wish would all die.”

Everyone sucks in a breath, unable to believe their eyes.

“Don’t come to me and act like the victim, because we both know that you are one of them whether you like it or not.” The black paladin told the once red paladin, right in his face.

Keith is almost hysteric; you can see the gears frantically turning in his head. The poor teen desperately trying to come up with anything that could change the older’s mind. 


	15. Oh Shit

The video ended as Keith turned heel and ran out of the room. The screen was paused, showing a still image of a debauched Keith with his hand clutching his heaving chest.

Everyone was shocked to silence. No one could believe what had just played out in front of them. The whole group was left staring, dumbstruck with gaping mouths. Lance was the first to reboot, emotions slowly dancing across his face. The confusion, sadness, anger and remorse very evident. “Shiro w- why- why? When did you-“ Lance took a shaky breath as he tried to correctly put all of his quickly jumbling thoughts into words. “How could you be so cruel to him? He didn’t deserve that.” Lance concluded, slowly tapering off.

“Keith may be Galra Keith now, but he is still our Keith.” Hunk started, unconsciously voicing his thoughts. “Pidge, when did you say this was?” The yellow paladin asked the shorter.

Pidge looked back at their holographic screen for the date before replying, “Almost a week before Keith left to go train at the Blade’s headquarters.” The green paladin said, their voice pitching up as they realized what that meant. “Shiro is the reason.” The smallest whispered.

“What Pidge? What do you mean Shiro is the reason?” Allura questioned

Pidged raised their voice a bit so everyone could hear them, but dropped their gaze to the floor. “The reason Keith left. You just got angry at him for going to the Blades, but it wasn’t his fault. Shiro was horrible to him.” They had never made the connection before then, that Shiro was the root of Keith’s departure. Shiro opened his mouth to say something when he was interrupted by Lance who asked a very good question.

“Guys? Allura just took Keith’s bayard right? And he isn’t in one of the lions? Where is he?” Lance asked, dread painting his features. The same thought crossed everyone’s mind as they soaked in that question. They kicked a possibly injured Keith out without his lion or bayard, leaving the Blade with nothing to defend himself.

“Oh Shit-“

**Author's Note:**

> i post pretty irregularly- please dont come for my soul :)


End file.
